Its 4:30 am on a chilly Sunday morning. You roll over to snuggle up – and guess what? No one’s sleeping next to you. Welcome to the Story of my Life. This past week, a lot of you texted, called and poured your love over social media as the Man of the House completed yet another 42.195 (Dare I round it off) km Run.
I’d love to take you all on the other side of that medal and show you a glimpse of the remaining 364 days. AND – to avoid turning this into a rant, I am going to try and restrict myself to pointers.
First – The Runner
- The runner has commendable expertise in going about bathroom chores without a rustle. He has this gifted ability to also close the main door without a bang. BECAUSE – dare he wake up the spo\nuse. Also includes effective use of phone torch to pull out the running gear from that creaky wardrobe.
- Pre-dayoff-nights are also Pre-longRun-nights. The bedtime is non-negotiable and most often even before the toddler’s bedtime. Date nights are a distant memory. Period.
- To me, vacations are all about Dolce Far Niente – Italian for the Joy of doing nothing. But for the runner, vacation mornings are Long run mornings. And then I learnt a new word – Sacrosanct. No Sleep-a-little-longer, no breakfast in bed, no joy of nothingness.
- The last End-of-Season sale list included the following – Running shorts, running ganji, new pair of exorbitantly priced running shoes, ankle length-extra padded-very scientifically designed pair of socks, a new running belt. Bas itna sa Khwaab hai.
- The last three doctor visits were for thigh pain, knee pain and back pain. All three visits were made to a sports doctor.
- The runner’s three primary parameters for gauging personalities are as follows – How far and how fast can one run , and, well – how large is the tummy.
- Two continuous days of no running = Runner’s major mood swing. Stay clear, be prepared to hear a lot of whining, and make arrangements to facilitate early dinner, early bedtime and therefore a good run.
- The runner is not feeling well – He’l go for a long run to “reboot” his system. The spouse fought with him last night – he’l go for a long run to clear his head. In a good mood or a special day – Long run for sure to celebrate. *Rolling my eyes while I type this*
The Spouse and the House
- A runner’s house has a display of numerous medals and bibs.
- Also, THAT annoying drawer overflowing with cloth marathon bags and pain relieving sprays (received with compliments in EVERY marathon kit bag) The drawer is emptied during annual Diwali cleaning spree and the stash is silently given away to the house help. Ah-se-aha tak.
- Just to put a number here on the blog – I counted. This particular runner has 26 dry fit marathon shirts, collected over various runs in the past few years. The only materialistic possession he is extremely possessive about. I haven’t managed to giveaway even a SINGLE t-shirt.
- Even though the toddler stopped wearing diapers, the leftover diaper rash cream is still carefully stored. When you run 42 kilometres in the sun, you end up having rashes on your neck because that collar continuously rubbed over the nape of your neck for over 4 hours.
- You regularly hear the house help say – “Bhaiyya daud ke aayega, uskey baad main pocha lagaegee.”
- If you are a runner’s wife – You’d surely know what’s a PBJ. Weekend nights are spent making these for the early morning run.
- The first three years of my married life were spent getting annual rabies injections done. NO kidding. If I was a dog, and I saw a man running at 5 am on a foggy night, I’d take a generous bite off his leg too.
You get the hang of it? Not easy being the other half of a runner eh.
Unsure if I should be elated or disappointed because with each passing day it seems like this running bug “runs” in the family. The toddler is ever-ready to run along with Daddy dearest on those leisurely evenings by the sea. When I married the man, we decided to stick by each other “in sickness and in Health”. Little did I know, it would mean waking up at 4 am just to pin the running bib on the marathon t-shirt.
P.S – All characters mentioned in this blog may or may not be fictitious. 🙂